Hello Lucy What is the song tha describs your personalite Thanck You Jason Montreal ,Qc Offhand, I think I'm gonna say "Supervixen" by Garbage. Come down to my house, stick a stone in your mouth You can always pull out if you like it too much Make a whole new religion A falling star that you cannot live without And I'll feed your obsession There'll be nothing but this thing that you'll never doubt A hit is hard to resist and I never miss I can take you out with just a flick of my wrist Make a whole new religion A falling star that you cannot live without And I'll feed your obsession There is nothing but this thing that you'll never doubt This thing you'll never doubt And I'll feed your obsession The falling star that you cannot live without I will be your religion This thing you'll never doubt You're not the only one You're not the only one Bow down to me Now I want it too much Now I want it to stop Now I'm lucky like a falling star that fell over me Bow down to me... Dear Lucy, I have three questions. First, I'm a white wolf from Washington, but my boyfriend is a Siberian wolf. He's so much bigger than me that I get mistaken for a cat when we're together! Do you have any ideas on how to get people to stop offering me fish when we go to restaurants? Secondly, I was thinking of dying my fur, but it seems so absurdly expencive, I might end looking like a calico (which REALLY wouldn't help problem number one). How would you suggest I change my color without having to sell my organs to buy enough dye? Last but not least, what's a good way to get a man to try something more kinky? Serban can be rather traditional, but I wanna have some variety, damn it. You work in ZZ Studios, I'm sure you know some tricks. Kat Ditonay, Yakutsk, Russia --- ~Build a man a fire, and he'll be warm for a day. Catch a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life~ First, to get people to stop offering you fish, stop going to restaurants that are so racially motivated in their suggestive selling. And stereotypical! Personally, I'm not a big fan of fish. Insert crude lesbianism comment here. Second, I asked Lydia about this, and she says that dying all your fur is indeed expensive. That's why most don't do it. Her suggestion is to just dye your hair, or "headfur," and leave the rest its original color, or choose a specific pattern you want dyed into it, like a temporary tattoo. Dying all your fur never looks right, she says, you just end up looking weird. Though I do know one wolf who managed to permanently dye all his fur purple... Third, try this. Play a game. Each of you get a pad of paper, and write down all the kinky things you'd like to try, making sure it's understood that you will not judge each other on your fantasies. You don't have to do everything on your respective lists, but it'll give you an idea of where your secret kinks overlap. Maybe you both like pissing, but didn't want to let the other know how you feel. Now you know, and can play watersports all you want. Dear Lucy, I know you are sensitive about music, but what about your name? Have you ever been called a nickname that you couldn't stand? (Lucielle, Loose, etc) I can't imagine you are the type to put up with that kind of stuff from just anyone. P.S. Do you like Oingo Boingo? -Catai There is only one name that really makes me roll my eyes: Juicy Lucy. Fortunately, not many people call me that. More people like to put on a Cuban accept and say, "'Ey Looosy!" or "You got some 'splainin' to do!" or some such. I hate I Love Lucy references. Trust me to get a job with a boss named Desi... As for Oingo Boingo... I have not been exposed to them enough to form an opinion. Dear Lucy, who do you think is the most promising under ground rock band? Also, do you feel Metallica has lost cred due to their influence on the destruction of Napster as we knew it, or was their legal battle warranted? Laters, -Brian Fur Will Fly- The worst part of waking up, is cat hair in your cup. http://ram.purrsia.com/fwf Read my comic, dagnabbit! Ram- Action, adventure, intrigue and a dash of the anthromorphic complex http://www.graphicsmash.com/series.php?name=ram I don't know about underground, but I think Evanescence are the best new band to show up in years. I am a bit afraid for their second album, though, provided they even make it that far after the loss of founding guitarist Ben Moody. They seem like the kind of band that could, like Linkin Park, get stuck making the same album over and over. If they manage to make an album as good or better than Fallen that shows some evolution, my good opinion of them will be solidified. Also, keep an eye on Hawksley Workman. That guy could make shit happen. As for Metallica, I think their legal battle was warrented, and it lost them some credibility. Downloading music is illegal (though I admit I download music all the time), but you see, there is a reason we call musicians "artists." I think they have a sort of responsibility to themselves not to produce the opinion that they do what they do only for money. Yes, they do do it only for money, but it's not the kind of thing that should be flaunted. I think a musician should at least maintain the illusion that they care about music for music's sake, not for the sake of the money it will make them. Otherwise, you end up looking like a greedy asshole, or a rapper. That was the mistake Metallica made: making their desire for riches so public. Everyone who thought they were badasses who didn't take shit from anyone and set out solely to rock people's worlds now see them as businessmen. Look at the St. Anger album. It doesn't suck as much as everyone seems to think it does, but people are so set against them now, nothing would satisfy them. Some people didn't like their more alternative outings, Load and Reload. So they went back to rock. And people are lashing out against that now. They cling to the fact that the snare drum sounds weird (By the way, I heard an interview with producer Bob Rock, and it turns out that snare was deliberate. Lars heard it, liked it, and decided to use it on the whole album. I think that's dumb, but there's your reason for it). The snare is not that freaky and unusual. Go listen to Our Lady Peace's first album, Naveed. It sounds like Jeremy Taggart is playing a damn tin can. That album was huge, and now, so are Our Lady Peace. The point is that, because Metallica showed off the side of them driven by money, they have lost the trust of their fans, and it will take a long time to get that back. Get ready for a whole lot of poor album sales and bad fan reviews, Metallica. Dear Lucy, Having worked for the US gov't, I know that they fingerprint all of their employees. How did Fisk get fingerprinted, or is there something equivalent for furry folks? Also, I've been pondering what to do for Spring Break (Finals will do that), and was hoping to visit New Talia. Can you recommend anything fun to do there (besides Zig)? Do they sell Mt Dew with or without caffeine (being from the states I really must have caffeine, doctor's orders)? Love Always, Sphynn Ever looked at a cat's paws? The tips of the fingers, the "pads," aren't covered with fur. There's your answer. As for fun things to do in New Talia... I hesitate to say this... but lots of people seem to enjoy going to Mt. Lucy. And no, the Mountain Dew doesn't have caffeine. The coffee does, though. Dear Lucy, There is something I don't understand. I guess this question is more for Lydia, but anyway; what's the point of Furs getting Tattooed? wont the fur cover up the area of flesh where the tattoo appears? or is it some sort of special dye that also effects the fur? In that case, shedding would also factor in.... I think I'm confusing myself.... slightly dazed, Foxin (www.freewebs.com/foxin) PS: Sorry for the shameless Plug for my site there. Oh, that's okay. Tattoos... yes... lots of you humans seem confused. Personally, I don't see how tattoos would work on humans. You'd have to, like.. inject dye that shows up on skin or something Anyway, I'll let Lydia explain this one... I don't actually do tattoos myself, my co-worker Sally does, but I know how they work. You start by shaving the fur in the area to be tattooed. Then, a special compound is injected into the skin that permanently alters the pigmentation of the fur, causing it to grow in a different color. The design is "drawn" this way, the tricky part being compensating for the grain of the fur (the direction it grows in). When done properly, the fur will grow back in the colors desired, creating a picture in the pelt. And since the pigmentation is permanent, shedding will not affect the tattoo. Dear Lucy, Do you prefer women or men? I mean that in both the sense of dating, and other activities. I'm curious to see if you have any steriotypes that you hold about the sexes. Sincerely, Scavnger I actually prefer women. I think people of the same gender are easier to get along with outside of a sexual relationship (at least that's what I've found). Guys' best friends are guys, and girls' best friends are girls, and that only helps when intimacy becomes a factor. Plus, women generally have a better working knowledge of the female anatomy. That said, however, I love sex with guys. I enjoy the act of oral sex on males, their anatomy is more conducive to anal sex, and... how can I put this... there are certain material components of the male orgasm that I have a healthy affection for. Dear Lucy, It seems that both of your Dear Lucy columns so far have ended with you leaving to masturbate. Is this pattern going to continue? Should we be concerned that you might not be devoting your full attention to our letters? What is your favorite toy? Favorite lube? Who do you most often fantasize about? What do you... wait hold on a sec'. Lucy masturbating... Lucy masturbating... Excuse me. I... left... something in the oven. Yeah. Much Love, Del Cooncat I don't like talking about such private matters too much, so please don't be offended by the fact that I intend to answer briefly. No, no, my tongue (we cats are flexible), natural secretions for the vagina and saliva everywhere else, and it varies. Enjoy your impending session of, shall we say, "coaxing Pearl Jam onto stage." Dear Lucy, In your last column you mentioned Lola's boyfriend. Is it just me, or does said boyfriend look an awful lot like Dirk? Is that because Mat draws all his male cats exactly the same (laziness is a common trait in webcomicry), or is Lola just some kinky fetish roleplay for Lydia to act out every so often? After all, you also mentioned that both Lola and Lydia -are- straight. Also, it's obvious you don't play Final Fantasy, but do you play video games at all? It seems like even the most ungeekish person obsesses over the Tony Hawk games, and regardless, video games have the most addictive music in the world, even if it's not of the quality of, say, Radiohead. -Technotronic I don't know what Lydia's kinky fetish roleplay is like, or even if it exists. Lydia strikes me as very vanilla (she just snickered). If Lola's boyfriend looks like Dirk, chalk it up to the fact that Mat is, indeed, very lazy. But really, where are you going to put defining features on a nonmorphic cat? It's not like he has hair or clothes... As for video games, no. I have played Counter-Strike, I admit that, but that is all. I don't even know what Tony Hawk is, though I am picturing some cartoonish mascot not unlike the chickenhawk that used to pester Foghorn Leghorn. As for the music, I'll take your word for it. Dear Lucy, What would you look like as a Japanese cartoon and what would it be about? -- Sam M. DISCLAIMER: Brothers Chaps, I am not ripping you off. This guy actually sent this letter, and I am obligated to answer it. I imagine I would look pretty much the same as a human in a Japanese cartoon, but black and white, with cat ears sticking out the top of my head, oversized paws, and a tail. Same with Lydia. And the cartoon would be about me and Lydia (Dirk would join in the second season) going around New Talia trying to collect all of some series of objects to save the world or become really good at using said objects. Cards, creatures, gems... I dunno, something like that. There would be fights with some hilarious (at least in intent) villains, possibly birds or dogs of some kind, who would tear open/off either Lydia's or my top, or both, in every second episode. Those scenes would be edited out or altered in North America, though. Oh, and Lola would be our wisecracking sidekick. She'd probably be wearing an outrageously large jinglebell on her collar. At first, I'd be really ditzy and boy-crazy, getting big watery hearts in my eyes every time I saw a "hunky" guy, running up to him and standing half hunched over with my hands clutched eagerly to my chest, asking him to ask me out. Then he'd always snub me, I'd get a big drop of water going over my head, Lola would make some crack about how boy-crazy I am, and I'd turn and beat her up (possibly with a large mallet or fish or something) while Lydia tells us to get back to the quest. But later, a love triangle would evolve, involving my unrequited lesbian feelings for Lydia, and I would spend a lot of time standing perfectly still, watching her and Dirk kiss with only my eyes animated to vibrate and "shimmer with tears." As the series got closer to its end, it'd become more serious, revealing a capable and sinister head villain. Then Lydia and I would use the powers of all the gems we collected to transform into magical heroines in fetish costumes, though each gem would also have a power unique to itself, probably representing some element like fire or grass or air. I should mention that Mat is literally laughing out loud now as he reads this over, so I guess I'll quit while I'm ahead. Note from Mat: Anime fans, please send me some email and tell me if this isn't exactly what an anime version of BDK would be like, because I am fucking proud of this, and I think it's hilarious.