Hey everyone! Sorry it's been so long since I answered my email, but as you may know, I've been out of town and in the USA recently, which of course was followed by a lawsuit. But all that's cleared up now, so now I'm gonna clear out my whole inbox in one shot! I've even set aside the little rules I put in place, and posted email from people who have written in previously. Ready? You better be, 'cause I'm not... Hello again from Chicago. Thanks for the tip to start listening to Great Big Sea, listened to 'em and loved 'em. Got the celtic feel, but are different enough from Flogging Molly to make it a change of pace. You mentioned an official "Lucy Koneko Seal of Approval for Good Taste in Music," and I must admit I developed a very selfish idea. Could this seal be made into something that could be brought along to Cons? Such as a picture of your face, with the title of the seal on it? No, I'm not a shameless consumer whore (often, anyway), but I do think it would give my friends a kick when I meet them up at MidWest Furfest this fall! I'd actually offer to put the seal together myself and send you a sample, but paint has decided to reboot my computer every time I open it, thus eliminating my artistic talents. Still, I could work something out with the lab computers, and email you that. Would you be ok with me drafting this seal up and sending it to you, for bestowal upon worthy persons? Thanks again for the tip on Great Big Sea! graceless Always a pleasure to pass on a musical tip. I'll forward the "Seal of Approval" idea to Mat for consideration, since he handles the merchandising and cons. Dear Lucy, I am sure you will like this change of pace, I am not writing you about sex or music, which you seem to get a lot of... humm go figure. Any how, you seem to have experience dealing with Heinous bitches, I happen to work with one of my own, so I really just want to know how to handle it, I mean do you spray from a distance or shove the spray can right in and let the nozzle do the work for you? thanks -the wolf with the can. PS I sort of need this reply quick... not to be rude or anything but she is coming out of the daze and my arm is getting tired of shaking the hair spray can. Uh... The latter. Hey there I'd actually like to ask or Lydia you about something that doesnt pertain to music, sex, or about your personal lives. Well here it goes... I've had a crush on one of my good friends for practically a year now and every time that I seem to talk to her she teases me for as long as possible before going on about her boyfriend. She knows that I've wanted to go out with her but every time that I think that I have a chance she gets a new boyfriend. But that isnt the problem... it's how many times that she gets a new boyfriend that bothers me. As far as I've been able to gather she thinks that being alone is the worst problem in the world and the only thing that solves that is getting a new one. I worry that she is going to get hurt worse and worse by all these guys and whenever I try to talk to her about it she thinks that I'm trying to sabatoge things and Sincerly Travis OH... one other thing... is it normal to have your first love on your mind more than breathing? She broke up with me about 2 years ago and I just cant get her out of my head. Please help The OX I've known girls like that. Some may say that I am one, but trust me, I'm not. This isn't about me, though. Now, I'm obviously no expert on relationships, but I'll give it a shot. And my shot is, I don't really think you can change people. This girl isn't going to just stop trying to get herself hooked up with guys whenever she's open just because you give her advice about it. If she feels that she needs a man in her life, then she's going to try to get one. But eventually, I suspect she'll mature and realize that real, meanigful relationships are not frivolous things to be replaced when they break, like plates. They're more like those cartoon Ming vases, which must be cherished and protected, and should be devestating when and if they're destroyed. She'll figure that out for herself, I hope. And if you're lucky, maybe you'll be the Ming vase. Just don't fuck it up like Peter Parker did in that Spider-Man movie. I mean, Jesus. Mary Jane was hot. And yeah, that can be normal, but you've gotta get over it. Dear Lucy, Would you consider going on "Survivor," or do you suddenly loathe reality shows after what happened on "New Talian Idol?" - Kampfy Uberhund I would not go on "Survivor," for two reasons. One, I have always hated reality shows. It didn't take "New Talian Idol" to give me that distaste; I already had it. And two, I'm a cat. Do you honestly think I could last a month without being pampered and lazy? Dear Lucy, Greetings from the lost one of the 50, New Mexico, and from me your most loyal reader (as far as I know) in my state, Mitsozuka, Z for short. I took a look at your other Dear Lucy questions and decided to give you a change of pace and ask some non-sequitir questions. I hope you answer them, and enjoy the change. First, Do you know how to dance? I know the question seems a bit odd, but I dance very well in a few different ways, and was wondering if you knew any steps I did. I play DDR, which hardly matters, I can Waltz, and not crush any toes, I can Cotton-Eye Joe, the only remotely country song I ever listen to, and I have even been known to rave if the occaision calls. Second, What is your idea of the perfect date? Again the oddness, but I am a hopeless romantic, and am also a big believer in chivalry and the (King) Arthurian way of life. Third, being a www.bobandgeorge.com fan, I have to ask... what is your favorite flavor of ice cream? Mine has to be daquiri Ice. Good for me, too... Fourth, and last of the random questions, have you ever had the chickenpox? and do you know if Anthropomorphic beings can even GET chickenpox? That about covers the unusual questions, now one pathetically cliche question, just for laughs. Have you ever read the Kama Sutra in any way shape or form Just wondering. An undying fan, Mitsozuka Ayarashi (but you can call me Z, or anytime you want!) First, I can slow dance when I have to, but I usually do that kind of half-moshing bounce-up-and-down thing people do at rock concerts. I mean, when I'm at rock concerts. Not when I'm at weddings and stuff. That'd be just embarrassing, especially if I was wearing something strapless. Second, my perfect date would be an early dinner, followed by a good rock concert. Sorry to kinda repeat myself there, but it's true. Third, I'd have to say my all-time favorite is chocolate chip mint, but I also like the kinds with cookie dough in them, and anything that has multiple types of chocolate in it. Foruth, no, no chicken pox. We have our own lovely diseases, like rabies. Fortunately, we have also developed medicines to combat diseases like that, that don't involve gunshots to the head. Barbaric humans. Sorry about the "barbaric humans" comment. I've been watching "Invader Zim." And finally, oh yes, I have. With all this talk of Dungeons and Dragons (and being roped into a campaign just recently), what are the chances of Lydia twinking' with Red Mage (http://www.nuklearpower.com/redmage.php) for a special column? l33t k1w1 http://www.kiwiblog.com Lydia? Pretty much nonexistant, I'd say. I don't really like "twinking out." I prefer roleplaying a character, not manipulating the rules to make an unstoppable combat machine. That misses the whole point. Dear Lucy, Thought Id write and say Gday from way over here in Australia. After reading one of your responses about Blow Jobs I couldnt help but wonder about your comments " I recommend finishing with a handjob. You can put your mouth back when he's about to go off, if you want, or give yourself a facial or pearl necklace. Guys like that. They aren't exactly easy to get off orally, anyway." As a female also, its always been my experience that a guy cums *much* quicker with oral stimulation. They love to go right down deep into the throat I find. Do you think its been your choice of partner, or that a different technique might make the difference for you there? Did you learn alot of your sexual technique at ZZ studios, and have you had much success in finding the elusive Male G Spot? What do you find turns a male on the most? Do you find that watching porn together is a turn on? ...... Well here I am just talking about sex, sometimes I find that once I start thinking of that, I cant get those thoughts out of my head. ..wooo the thought of going down. Does that happen to you as well Lucy, where you start to think of sex and really want it? Moving onto other interesting topics now, What are your thoughts on Aussie bands?, have you heard of Powderfinger or The Butterfly Effect? they would be 2 of my favorites from over here.. Have a listen if you ever get the chance. Anyway, Ill say bye now - Lacey Melbourne, Australia It varies from guy to guy. It could be a technique thing, too. I don't really enjoy deep-throating that much, myself, though I understand it does a great job of getting him off. I prefer to feel the cum on my tongue or face or whatever, not have it just shoot down my throat... I knew most of my sexual techniques before the studio days, though a girl can always pick up new pointers... I think I've managed to find the prostate a few times. It's hard to tell with some guys, while others just explode... There are three things that I find really turn guys on: 1) the scent of aroused female, 2) the soft, pleasured sounds a girl makes, and 3) watching girls make out with each other... Porn is a turnon sometimes, though it depends on the situation... And yes, yes that does happen to me... I have heard Powderfinger and enjoy them, and I don't mind Jet or Pearl Ja- I mean, Silverchair too much. That's about it, though. My knowledge of Australian bands is pretty limited. I'm a new reader to the site, and I gotta say I'm hooked. Definitely a lot of laughs. ^_^ Anyway, a few (hopefully) non-cliche questions: 1) Any knowledge/thoughts on the U.K. band Boa (not the Korean singer BoA *shudders*)? 2) Considering the general consensus that porn music is all cheesy and pointless, how do you try and make your music better than the typical stuff? Considering your excellent taste in music, I'm sure you have plenty of inspiration to make some excellent music. ^_^ Oh, and any plans on making professional (non-porn) music? 3) You seem to be quite the intellectual, so here's an off-beat question: read any good books lately? Gotta have something original to ask. ^o^ That's all from me. I hope to be further entertained by you and the rest of the BDK crew for a long while. ^_^ Sincerely, Marlene 1) Nope. 2) My techniques for making porn music are kinda complicated, but I basically try to make it music that's understated enough not to distract from the action, and has a tempo that matches the action, and is also interesting enough that I wouldn't mind listening to it without watching the movie. That last part is the real acid test. 3) I'm afraid I haven't really had a lot of time for reading lately. The last real good book I read was Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Scoff if you must, but the Harry Potter series really has gotten a lot better with each passing book, to the point where it is now acceptable fantasy. So in the April 5th comic, we saw you wearing a white dress. But that raises some questions well known to anyone who has had white clothing and cats in the same vicinity, and which would be particularly exacerbated in the case of a feline actually wearing said clothing: How do you keep from getting highly-visible shed fur all over it? Even the most well-kempt coat has a tendency to lose hairs from time to time, and white clothing makes it extremely apparent. On a completely different topic, is there any chance Mat will be producing artwork of any kinky porn involving you? Because everyone ought to know that 'BDSM' stands for 'Badly-Drawn Sadomasochism.' (or possibly 'Black Dog Serves Meals', but that's only relevant on Martha's Vineyard) Be seeing you! Setta Yeah, the fur thing is tricky. Fortunately, we live in a society that has more or less come to expect it,. so no one minds a few stray hairs here and there. Other than that, we try to brush them off when we spot them, and there are simple grooming devices one can buy to keep the hair off, like a sticky roller thing you roll over the fabric to collect the hair. As for the second question, I certainly hope so, but Mat sucks, so... Hello... a few questions: 1) Are there any humans in New Talia? 2) Are there any non-anthropomorphic cats in New Talia? 3) If yes to number two, is it considered neat to own a non-anthropomorphic cat which looks like you in general coloring and details, or just weird? 4) Does Lola live in New Talia, or is she in a wierd alternate reality, like Matt? I ask this because she seems able to see and comment on events which occur, but nobody else seems to notice her. Thanks a lot! Scott, Halifax, Nova Scotia 1) Nope. 2) Nope. 3) N/A 4) Lola is sort of a Mat-esque foruth-wall-breaking plot device, nonexistant in BDK canon. Hey lucy. Are you a fan of ed the sock's Annual TV special: "Fromage?" Or do you get much music in New Talia? I LOVE THAT SHOW! We actually do get MuchMusic here, since it's so close to Canada, and I have made an effort to watch that every year. God, I love Ed the Sock. Hey there Lucy I have a few questions to ask you and one of them is regarding music. What is your opinion on Alice Cooper and his music.....what? if you never heard of Alice Cooper and yes I am correct in saying HIS because Alice is a he, then you don't know what your missing. Anyway on to the next question, if you could date any wrestler in the WWE who would it be? and you can't pick the Rock cause he's married and wouldn't date anyway cause he's off making movies. Lastly, why in the blue hell are you backing the Canucks? GO LEAFS! P.S. If you win an award at the awards show your one step closer to becoming a female Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla. Sincerely Ira "Raven" Timothy and Fan of Chris Jericho. Of course I know about Alice Cooper, and he sure ain't bad. But I don't know about any WWE wrestlers. I tried watching it to researching this letter, some show called SmackDown. It's pretty blustery and dumb for the most part, but that Miss Jackie girl is hot, especially that outfit she was wearing. Too bad she seems to be alligned with that Rico guy, who looks so not-gay that the whole gimmick just makes him look retarded. As for hockey, I'm not officially backing the Canucks. I'm a Thrashers fan. But since they didn't make the playoffs, I've defaulted to Tampa Bay, and that seems to be working well. I am (or was) backing the Canucks in the West, however, because I think they're a good team and they deserve to win a Stanley Cup after 34 years. You could say something similar about St. Louis, I suppose, but screw them. I made my choice. And as a quick follow-up... Hi Lucy i wrote to you earlier well this one is a follow up. In my last Email I said why not root for the Toronto maple Leafs. I guess that's kind of a moot point now that they got knocked out of the plays off by the team that satan built.....Philly. Anyway I'm going for Calgary and I wanted to ask you again your opinion on some old legends. Ones who influenced music today like Alice Cooper, the man who is god to me, and KISS. Now going from one extreme to the other how do you feel about really extreme Deathmetal like Dark Funeral, Cradle of Filth, and Evil Incarnate. Well, I already answered the hockey thing, though I'll add that I am also going for Calgary now. I also mentioned Alice Cooper. Kiss are pretty good too, but I hate death metal. Village Idiot Seven-Day Drip Strangers in the Morning French Pussy Stiffed Mind Over Mauling Grand Central Stairway Right Way to Wipe Talian Fix Split Lip and the Lima Beans Mindrake Leap into Chaos Backflip Renegades A String of Obscenet--oh, wait, that was already used. Just some suggestions. - Calagainandagainandagain (getting sick of me yet?) You should know, readers, that this email had the subject "Band Names?" And we have finally picked a name, as it turns out. What is it? You'll see... Aw, Lucy, you should have let me known you wanted someone to go with ya to the Pussy Award show! I'm always available to check out hot pussy! ;9 --Jezzebel Dammit! Of course! I'm sorry, Jezz. I should have thought of you, but my mind was elsewhere. Next time, I promise. Dear Lucy, I just saw the most interesting... art film, of your cousin Pursia. The odd thing was, their was this black cat couple in the background that was always out of focus... They looked oddly familiar to me, I don't suppose you'd have any idea who they might be? -Curious in Cleveland Well, it sure wasn't me and Fisk, if that's what you're thinking. Fisk doesn't like being filmed, I've never acted in porn, and Persia lives in Alabama or something. Come to think of it... I've lost track of where she lives. I should ask Mom. Hi Lucy, me again! Congratulations on the pussy award! I was jazzed (with an "A", not an "I", mind you) to hear that you won. One question, though. Where the heck was Zig the whole time? I thought she would be your date for the awards, but after I found out that you asked Sally to go with you, I was certain it was because Zig was hosting the awards, but she wasn't. I'm putting foward my offer now, take it whenever you want.... If you ever need a date for an awards show/party/formal gathering/etc., just give me an email and I'll be there. I'm currently without scanner so I can't send a picture, but I'm male, young, about 6'3", with black hair and brown eyes. Anyways, I'll be able to notice you. Later, Kilian Zig had her own date. She was around, just not with me. And as for future dates, it looks like Jezzebel just beat you to it. Sorry! Alive without breath, As cold as death; Never thirsty,ever drinking, All in mail never clinking. Lydia says it's a vampire in a post office. Sounds pretty sensible. This thing all things devours; Birds,beasts,trees,flowers; Gnaws iron,bites steel; Grinds hard stones to meal; Slays king, ruins town, And beats high montain down. Lydia says it's a hungry giant. Sounds pretty sensible. we all know that your brother works for the military and all, but what I am wondering is if you would ever think about joining the american military. If you would ever join which branch do you think you would go to? Army, Navy, Marine Corps, Air Force, or even the Coast Guard? Repectfully Hospitalman Apprentice Berg US Navy I would not join the military, because I am weak, and because I don't want to sacrifice my beliefs for the current military commanders. I don't think the "defending a certain patch of Earth from uncertain and perhaps nonexistant threats" excuse is going to get me extra points when I have to stand before God and explain why I killed people. You may think that you are doing quite well in the military, and that's fine. Beliefs are a very personal thing, and I won't try to influence you or tell you that you're wrong, because you could be right for all I know. But I'm standing by mine. Hey Lucy! Here in Canada, we are having a nation wide contest to see who is the greatest Canadian (you can learn more at http://www.cbc.ca/greatest/). Anyway, Who do you think is the greatest Canadian? I personally think that it is General Romeo Dallaire because of his courage and efforts to stop genocide in Rwanda. Also, who do you think is the greatest New Talian? Man, I don't know anything about Canadians, or New Talians. For all I know, the greatest Canadian was Neil Young. Dear Lucy, I just read the entire strip from start to Finish, and I’ve notices one thing, everyone is either feline, canine, vulpine, or mephitis. Where are the Rodents (And no the Rabbit that drug into the orgy scene doesn’t count, Rabbits are not rodents.) Like Rats and mice? I happen to be a rat and to be totally honest, I think I may have a crush on you. Would you ever consider an interspecies relationship? We seem to share common taste in music, except I would have thrown in QUEEN Bohemian Rhapsody in your mix, I’m a big Queen fan. Gee this is beginning to make me sound like a drooling fanboy. Well, maybe I should just end this letter before I make a fool of myself Forever Furry Bryan (The Rat) Gardner PS Do you have a nude picture of yourself I can fantasize to? I like how you asked for the nude picture after expressing concern for looking like a drooling fanboy. Anyway, here. The deal I made was that I'd show this picture if people stopped asking to have sex with me or see me naked. So enjoy. As for your main question, I don't really know. I guess New Talia is just a fairly cat-saturated country. I know I used to see a lot of mice when I lived in Georgia, but there aren't as many here. I don't know why. And yeah, I've been in lots of interspecies relationships. It's no big deal to me. Dear Lucy: If you could be a consultant for any company and had to change the "MEN" and "WOMEN" designators on the restrooms to two other words, what would they be? Also, does ZZ Studios have them changed to anything different? (I was thinking maybe pictures of a rooster and a cat, respectively, but I'm sure Zig is more creative than moi.) Love Always, Sphynn Depends on the company. If you're going to change those words to more theme-based ones, you have to know the theme first. I couldn't say, like, "DICKS" and "CUNTS," only to discover that they're going on doors in an elementary school. And unfortunately, the ZZ Studios just has "MEN" and "WOMEN" marked on its doors. Zig keeps the unprofessionalism to actions, not building design.